Wednesday, September 3, 2014

Never published weird crap I've written, found in my drafts

As a disclaimer, I might have been drinking Tito's and tonic when I wrote this, god knows when.
Also, I've never claimed to be nOrMaL

"I have ruined a brand new shirt.
I am not upset about this.
Straight out of the packaging this morning fold marks ironed out. (I iron my own) This shirt will never look this good again.
I went to put my cell phone in the shirt pocket to discover there was no shirt pocket. wtf?
Like the other shirts I bought recently, the cut on the sleeves appears to be for a cadaver; arms at sides never to be raised above the shoulders, laid out in, " he looks so life like" splendor. No pleat on the back. wtf?

What this post is really about is chopsticks and Asian food in general.
I have grease spotted my new shirt while consuming Vietnamese food from a local restaurant.
When I eat Asian, I find it a great challenge to eat with chopsticks. Now I have a reason to never wear this shirt again."


2 comments:

  1. Yeah! Show that shirt who's boss!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Keep one of those tide pen thingies in your purse. If you hit the spot quickly enough it sometimes works. Save maybe 50% of otherwise ruined shirts/blouses that way. Worth the $3.

    ReplyDelete

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