Landmines

not this...

this:

Pop Quiz question:

“Does this ___ make me _____look ___?” Fill in the blanks. There are endless possible entries. An actual incorrect response can bring days of unmitigated pain.

Dancing with the stars is on. It's a show I'd skip in a heartbeat, but the lovely Belle likes it, so we watch. Kirstey Alley is competing. Belle comments that she thinks Kirstey is still pretty.
Between chewing and breathing the best response I have is an 'uh uh” with a subtle negatory head rotation ( had I known what was coming, it would have been an uh---oh). She replied “I do too think she is pretty”. (I thought I was participating in a conversation.) Unaware of my predicament , I responded “ I wasn't saying you didn't think she was pretty, I was saying I don't think she is still pretty”. Foolishly thinking that this snippet of dinner time conversation had drawn to a close, I assumed it was safe to take another bite.
She says, “ She's bigger than me, but I think she's prettier than me, don't you?”
That's when I heard the first click of the mine trigger under foot. My brain raced, uncertain if I should lift my foot and dive for cover. Mouth full, I gave a heartfelt negative head gesture, grimacing mightily and wondering how I'd managed to walk into this situation. Fortunately, she read's Borepatch's blog while we eat dinner on the couch, in front of the TV. While she was engrossed, I managed to replace my foot with a fairly large chunk of stupidity and survive.