Tuesday, December 28, 2010

AB + PT = GT

No, that's not an algebraic equation, but rather it means, Adult Beverages + Pointy Things = Good Times.

I've talked about it before, but one of my favorite things to do to pass the time is shoot darts.  Naturally, with every good dart shooter, there is also an adult beverage involved and of course, I am no exception.

Well today, for my Merry Christmas to me, I bought myself a new set of darts.  I'm thrilled because they are identical to a set that some drunk walked off with years ago when I was shooting at the professional level.

They say that it's not the arrow it's the indian, but in my case, the right arrow really does help.  Back when my other set walked off, I did replace them, but it just wasn't the same, they didn't 'feel' right between my fingers.  Tonight, when I picked up the new set, it felt like home.

This year, I will be shooting in the Texas Regional Bullshooter competition which is coming up really soon.  I go every year, but this year will be the first in a long time that I will actually be excited about playing.  Something about having 3 old friends with me...  yes my new mini-missles.

I'll be blogging lots that weekend, I'm sure because I get to stay in the hotel and in between events, will have nothing better to do than order room service and blog, which I'm so happy about!

Now that the holidays are almost over, I should be able to post more interesting things rather than the random blather that you all have been getting from me lately.

Sunday, December 26, 2010

God My Ass is Cold Part 2

About a month ago, I told a little story about my first ski trip and promised another part to that story, about my first trip on the big kids’ run filled with excitement, humor and all around fun.  Well, I don’t know if it’ll be all that, I mean, what could be better than wrasslin a 60 pound outboard motor, but I’ll do my best.

So the husband and I were on our honeymoon and I had taken a little spill down on the bunny slopes.  I discussed the parts of a crash, the mental, the ‘oh shit’ moment, then the actual crash itself.  Of course what always follows that is embarrassment and in some cases tears, whether the tears are from being injured or embarrassed depend on the severity of the fall.

After taking the spill down below, the husband and I decided to go ahead to the top of the mountain and ski up there for the rest of the day.  We got on the lift and went up to the top and skied to mid mountain for a few hours.  There wasn’t a lot of snow, as it was early in the year and there was a drought happening.  We ended up having to take a blue (intermediate) run called West Fork but it was a nice wide run so I could traverse the mountain well enough to get by without falling on my rear or worse my face.

A few hours later, my confidence level was up (amazingly, I am a natural skier) and so was my appetite, so we decided to ski all the way to the base of the mountain and grab a bite to eat and possibly an adult beverage before heading back up to top off a wonderfully perfect day of skiing.  We took this green (beginner) run called Demon Run which was kind like a very wide half pipe.  It was a long straight shoot with really high walls.

I was skiing down Green Demon and was doing well, but I was going a little fast and the ski patrol guy yelled at me so, in trying to slow down, I turned my skis sideways and shot straight up the wall and into the trees.  I didn’t fall down, I was so proud, but was a little afraid of having to ski back DOWN that wall to get back to the run.  I took a deep breath and off I went, down the wall, back to the run where my darling man was waiting for me at the end of the run.

So we’re standing at the end of Green Demon where it turns into a blue run, also called Demon Run, so for the sake of this story, I will call it Blue Demon.  Now, before I go on with this portion of my story, let me explain that I learned after all of this that the color coded runs are not relative to skiing level, but relative to the mountain itself.  Green Demon, on a different mountain would have been Blue and Blue Demon elsewhere would have been Black (advanced).  That said…..

I’m standing there at the top of Blue Demon, looking down and thinking to myself, “Oh my God, this is STEEP!”  I looked up at my husband and said something akin to, “Are you crazy?”  He looked at me and told me to just follow him, and I will be fine.  Easy for him to say!  I’m looking down at a steep ‘bowl shaped’ slope, I’m NOT fine!

So off the husband goes and he, of course, made it look easy.  I took a deep breath and started down this nightmare of a run (remember this is my very first ski trip).  So things are going fine, I’m traversing the slope like a pro, but am beginning to pick up speed.  I keep trudging along and I get getting faster and faster, which makes me a little uneasy.  Suddenly, I hit a bump in the slope and my skis are airborne.  Now, it was probably only a few inches in the air, but might as well been a few feet.  Either way, my skis were in the air, NOT on the mountain!  I landed with relief only to immediately find myself in the air yet again.  This is where my mental crash started to happen.  I knew I was going to crash and I began to panic.

So, when my skis finally touched ground (only a second later, but felt like hours), I tried to hockey stop by turning my skis sideways.  This was the ‘oh shit’ moment, I came right out of my skis while dropping my poles all at the same time.  My body flies through the air and I land on my back, spread eagled and began to spin down the mountain, like a pinwheel on my back.

I’m looking up at the treetops, spinning above me while I’m digging into the snow with my fingernails (my gloves came off in the fall) trying to stop myself.  Finally, I stopped with my head down slope and my feet upslope.  I tilted my head up and could see these two guys gathering up all my stuff that came off me along the way.  My poles, my skis (which were together and perfectly perpendicular to the slope) and my gloves were all gathered up by these young gentlemen.

Meanwhile, I’m getting to my feet, my headband was all pushed back and my sunglasses were catty-cornered along my face.  I swear if I would have slid any further down that mountain, I probably would have ended up naked!

You might be wondering where my husband was during all this…  he was way ahead of me, waiting for me and realized that I had fallen down, but was the epitome of patience and concern, but knew that I was okay since I was standing up.

So the boys get to me and they’re in their 20’s and they say, “Are you alright ma’am?”  I sniffled, the tears flowing down my face and said, “Yes, I’m fine, I’m just really embarrassed!”  They said, “Oh no! Don’t be embarrassed, you looked really cool!  That fall was awesome!”

The youngsters helped me into my skis and assured me that I had made it down the worst part of the run, the rest was a piece of cake.  So, I nervously set out on the second half of the run, and yes that part was a piece of a cake.  We went and hand our lunch and I stayed in the bar the rest of the day having adult beverages.  I was NOT going back up that mountain that day!

Well, I went back the next day and we found an alternate route to the bottom of the mountain that had a few hairpin turns that you certainly didn’t want to miss as you would end up in the trees with a 3 foot drop, broken bones or sudden death assured.  Worse part about that run were the bare spots in it, but those were easy enough to miss.

It was a fun trip but my lesson learned is that I will not go so early in the season ever again!

Until Next Time

Saturday, December 25, 2010

Merry Christmas!

I love Robert Earl Keen but this song is a great one.  He and Lyle Lovette were roommates in college.

Merry Christmas From the Family
Robert Earl Keen

Mom got drunk and Dad got drunk at our Christmas party
We were drinking champagne punch and homemade eggnog
Little sister brought her new boyfriend
He was a Mexican
We didn't know what to think of him until he sang
Feliz Navidad, Feliz Navidad

Brother Ken brought his kids with him
The three from his first wife Lynn
And the two identical twins from his second wife Mary Nell
Of course he brought his new wife Kay
Who talks all about AA
Chain smoking while the stereo plays Noel, Noel
The First Noel

Carve the Turkey
Turn the ball game on
It's margaritas when the eggnog's gone
Send somebody to the Quickpak Store
We need some ice and an extension chord
A can of bean dip and some Diet Rites
A box of Pampers, Marlboro Lights
Halelluja everybody say cheese
Merry Christmas from the family

Fred and Rita drove from Harlingen
I can't remember how I'm kin to them
But when they tried to plug their motor home in
They blew our Christmas lights
Cousin David knew just what went wrong
So we all waited out on our front lawn
He threw the breaker and the lights came on
And we sang Silent Night, Silent Night, Oh Holy Night

Carve the turkey turn the ball game on
It's Bloody Marys
Cause We All Want One!
Send somebody to the Stop 'N Go
We need some celery and a can of fake snow
A bag of lemons and some Diet Sprites
A box of Tampons, some Salem Lights
Halelluja, everybody say cheese
Merry Christmas from the Family

Feliz Navidad!

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Good Article

The Lee's Summit Conservative has a wonderful article over there about our personal freedoms, in particular our freedom of speech.

I do have to amend a little something that he wrote over there.  He said, "For all of us to sit idly by and allow the Obama Administration, or any administration whether Republican, Libertarian, or Democrat to further curtail the freedom of speech, the freedom of openly sharing ideas and concepts and even arguments, is to relinquish the rights our forefathers fought to create and to preserve."

While I agree with him in principle, I have to disagree with the premise that our founders created our rights. Our rights are not granted to us by a benevolent government, our rights are inalienable and can never be taken away, they can only be violated.

The moment that we start thinking that someone other than our creator (whatever that may be, intelligent design, or fluke of nature) gave us our rights, is the moment that they can take them away.  Our rights as human beings do not cease to exist simply because a government refuses to acknowledge those rights.  They still exist.  As rational creatures, we must always keep that in mind and always fight to prevent our rights from being violated.

Until next time

It's Almost Over

I guess all the years that I worked retail in my young life has really affected my view of Christmas.  I've come to dread it in my adult life, although, I do have to say that last weekend really reminded me of how joyful it can be when you have small children.

My kids are all grown but my oldest daughter, who pretty much made a mess of her life when she was a teenager, really made me remember of much more fun times when the kids were all small.

My daughter completed her first semester at college without dropping her class and giving up.  So my husband and I surprised her with a laptop computer. We were at my mother's house at a family gathering and she opened her gift, and it was the last thing she expected to get and the look on her face reminded me of a time when Christmas was magical.

She ran to me and jumped in my lap (she's only 4 foot 11 inches and 23 years old) and hugged me so tight.  Tears were flowing all around.  It was a terrific day.  I can only hope that my other grown kids are as appreciative, we'll see.

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Sporadic Blogging

I know that you all haven't heard from me in a while, I apologize for that.  It's crazy for me right now at work and the holidays... well...   UGH!  They are busy, too.

Things are good...  am still alive and kicking which is much better than the alternative.  I'm still hoping that Congress will continue to let me keep my hard earned dollars...   of course they keep saying that they are giving tax cuts?  What the hell is that all about?  They are keeping taxes the same, they aren't cutting anything, though I wish they would... starting with cutting their stupid tongues out of their mouths and cutting their crazy budget!

Anyway, soon enough, I'll be blogging more often and probably boring you guys to tears!  Until then, if you celebrate it, Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah!

Sunday, December 12, 2010

It’s our money, NOT theirs!

I keep hearing from the MSM how extending Bush’s reversal of Clinton’s tax increases will cost the government x amount of dollars.  When will they ever figure out that this is the money that WE the PEOPLE earn and it doesn’t belong to the government!

How can something that they aren’t already getting cost them money?  Of course, they are deficit spending out the wazoo and they were expecting to get a nice tax increase in January.  You know, if I am expecting a raise, I don’t go out and spend that raise, I wait to see if it actually comes.  Of course they can’t possibly expect to keep the same standard. 


Sunday, December 5, 2010

The Human Spirit

There is one thing that I have noticed about liberals in general, their hatred of man.  Many of them believe that humans are somehow outside of nature and that what we do destroys rather than builds something productive.

We are, for some reason, supposed to feel guilty for building a livable society.  We are supposed to express the same amount of self-loathing that they undoubtedly feel.  I reject this notion.

I believe that man is basically good.  That what we, as human beings accomplish is within the balance of nature and that whatever odd weather patterns are taking place has little to nothing to do with mankind.

Yesterday, I took my mother and my oldest granddaughter to see The Nutcracker at the Houston Ballet.  It was a first time to see that show for all of us.  I have to say that watching my little granddaughter’s eyes widen when the ballerinas started to dance made me truly believe that the human spirit is alive and well.  It was magical.

As I watched the show in utter amazement, I know that the values that I hold are true.  There is something profound about watching a person perform a craft that they have worked their whole life to accomplish.  This holds true for every profession, but watching the dancers, knowing the countless hours they put into their performance, really moves me.  How can anyone believe that humans are not a part of nature? 

Yes, the human spirit is alive and well.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

We are Soooo Screwed!!!

Okay, so I am watching TV and a commercial comes on.  It's a commercial for none other than the CIA.  Apparently they are recruiting for agents....  what the hell is that?  The last line of the commercial is "don't just watch the news, live it"

What the hell????????

It's a sad day when the CIA advertises for agents.  How many of my tax dollars went for that crap?  What's next?

Speaking of Work

I got home from work today and went out in the backyard where Miss Kitty was pretending to be the great mighty Lioness, and stalking a bird.  She kind of reminded me of Snoopy in the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown, crouching through the pumpkin patch.

Anyhoo, so when I opened up the back door, the bird flew off.  Miss Kitty immediately gave me the stink eye for chasing off her potential kill.  Penny, the dog, followed me out the door and Miss Kitty was looking as if she was about to start stalking her.  Miss Kitty outweighs Penny 3 to 1 so I guess she figured that if she couldn't have a bird, the dog would do just fine.

Fortunately, Miss Kitty was foiled again as Penny followed me back into the house.

Work Work Work and more Work

I need a vacation to recover from my vacation!  Work has me way busy at the moment so haven't posted.  Never fear though, part two of God My Ass is Cold is coming and it should be good for a laugh or two...