Thursday, May 5, 2011

Ladies who belch

Yes I know what you're going to say, "Ladies do NOT belch, at least not loudly in public."

Last night, that statement was proven to be untrue tenfold.

I was playing a dart match against the woman from the other team and her partner, and my partner and I were winning by a fairly wide margin. I walk up to the line to shoot and as I'm taking aim, I hear a loud, long, "BUUUURRRRPPPP."

I turned around and looked at the woman, who I've known for years and is usually the very quiet type and asked, "was that you?"

She grinned and said, "why yes it was!"

I said, "I'm shocked!"

So I stepped back to the line and took aim again and a fleeting thought of two of my three daughters and their uncanny ability to belch louder than I've heard any grown man belch and had developed this talent when they were 8 and 4.

Of course once that thought came over me, I began to laugh and once I start laughing, sometimes it's hard for me to stop. One place that you do not want to be when I begin to laugh is in the vicinity of a dart board when it's my turn to shoot. Granted I did eventually hit the board but totally missed my shot.

First dart, I took aim at the triple 20 and launched it into the single 12 (waaaay off). I laughed even louder as I brought my second dart up to aim and dropped it over my shoulder onto the ground... oops it slipped.... so I picked it up and launched that one into the triple 5 (closer that time).

Now, you have to understand that while all this is going on there are various cute and funny comments going on in the background which is not helping my situation at all.

Finally I launch the third dart and hit the triple 18 which technically was still a miss, but hey, it was a good miss!

Thankfully, we were playing 501 so all of those darts thrown counted and that round was worth 105 points. (The other team was not happy considering those were lucky darts, of course, they know me well enough to know that I rarely throw lucky darts, I have a fair amount of skill and rarely get lucky in a miss)

That just goes to show you that every now and then, even a blind squirrel will occasionally find a nut.


  1. The women I know and love are real 'women', not 'ladies'. I love them for friendship, not acting. My wife can pull off any formal black tie event with the highest of class and can come home and belch. Most women that are comfortable with themselves, and comfortable with their friends/mates will be honest people - real to themselves and real to others.

  2. Wait, I thought women did not belch, they simply exploded due to buildup of internal pressure at some time ;)

  3. I've told my son I fart and burp daisies and sunshine.

    That's my story and I'm sticking to it.


  4. hah, you two make me raugh.
    No Keads, it's why they appear to gain weight as they get older. Their bodies are highly elastic. Women never actually get heavier than 120 lbs.


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