Tuesday, August 2, 2011


Just saw the trailer for the "new" planet of the apes movie coming out.
The scene that caught my eye was the chimpanzees jumping through the glass, x number of stories up, from an office tower.
Now, I know from watching all the nature shows that a chimpanzee is purported to be stronger than a man. I have a theory about that. When the chimpanzee's monkey brain kicks in, there is not much else to throttle it down. I highly suspect that if your monkey brain kicked in, and for a brief moment you had no concern about police or lawyers, you would find you had "super human" strength. Aretae writes frequently of the "monkey brain". Go, read. Every now and then, his feet touch the earth and my IQ tweeks up.
As usual, I digress.
The glass in your house is "float glass", 1/8" thick or so. Perhaps you have the expensive Pella windows, double pane with the low E coating. Kudos.
The glass in tall buildings is nothing like the glass in your house. In this modern day and age, it stands up to hurricane force winds and earthquakes.
In real life, if you decided to do a "Bruce Willis" and jump through the office tower window while holding on to a fire hose, one of two things would happen. You would bounce off the the window and fracture your clavicle, or if you actually managed to make it through, you would swing down and bounce off the glass on the next floor down. At which point, it is highly likely you would have an unscheduled meeting with the pavement below.
So, my advice is, if you are going to try to jump through an office tower window, I suggest shooting it first, with whatever handgun you have on hand. Otherwise, you will be nursing a broken clavicle in the hoosegow.
(don't forget to shoot the window on your way back in...)


  1. Mr. Superintelligent Ape?, I'd like you to meet my little friend Ms. Hunting Rifle. Yeah, that one looks like it would take more of my suspension of disbelief than I'm willing to give.

  2. Is it just me or do the vast majority of 'new movies coming out' seem to be remakes of movies we watched decades ago?

  3. I wonder if the vast majority of 'new movies coming out' aren't just remakes of movies we watched decades ago?

    (Copied from you and changed only very slightly because I don't have a new thought in my head, either)


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